I don't know about you, but I have over 500 friends. All I do is hike mountains, party, eat delicious meals, go on amazing vacations, visit my family, go to beautiful towns, have amazing times with my friends, enjoy the most awesome life with my boyfriend and live it all the way up. I am a wise guru with always something usually so intelligent, universal and deep that it's mind-blowing. I am perfectly mature and many times very angry at the whole of humanity. Sometimes I'm very funny or sometimes I'm just straight up interesting and cool. I sing, dance and make charming videos displaying all the fun and joy that I am always experiencing. People leave me loving and supportive comments, they tell me what a great person I am and how much they love me. I'm also a heartthrob, I get people hitting on me or telling me how much they adore me through messages. I'm just living the grand Facebook life.
Others may ALWAYS be bored or angry or tired, always going through some trouble, needing help, wanting attention, etc. Some are just always so excited about something in the future, others are just so hurt by the past. Some are just these thriving superstars who are the center of attention. Others are the funny jokesters, drama queens, millionaires, party-animals, hard workers, bodybuilders, sexy beasts, etc.
What is your Facebook saying about you?
Whatever it is, it shares one thing with real life... you can present yourself however you want... or should I say however you think you should.
It's cool in one way and sad in another in the sense that many of us portray an image of ourselves that is inconsistent with reality all because we are afraid of not being accepted if we show who we really are. In fact, we think it's smart to put on a show to catch our prey. The story we tell ourselves is that lying and pretending to be something we are not is okay, because that is who we really are deep down and eventually it will all become true.
Of course, that's not the point of this note though. The point is to make an attempt to expand the mind of the reader as always. To open your eyes in the direction of reality.
Facebook is a bunch of fragments of reality. It's the capturing of MOMENTS in life. Whether it's an event, a mood, a thought, a feeling, whatever. It's very tiny PIECES of symbols that are supposed to represent reality. Many times they're not really representing reality but our illusions or delusions about it.
People in this culture are dishonest enough with themselves without Facebook - give them Facebook and they will outpicture their delusions and illusions sooner than you can say cheese.
There are all these delusional "super models," "super stars," "historical figures," "amazing humans," "make-up artists," "singers," "actors," "kings," "queens," you name it!
There are all these "cool people" with huge personalities and they're so cool and collected. Their lives are so under control and everything is just so magical and perfect. And there is also the other extreme of the deluded "always feeling shitty about life, bored and grumpy." As if either extreme was real.
Here I go: I don't buy your stories of ultimate happiness and I don't buy your stories of ultimate misery. That's not reality. In real life, no one is always happy and no one is always bored. They are both shows. In real life nobody is always at a party and nobody is always smiling. Just like in real life no one is always bored in their room and nobody is always sad and crying.
My hope is that this note can help you see that you are way more than a fixed idea. That you are way more than a persona or an image. That life is way more than Facebook and that all those magazine articles, TV shows and virtual information are incredibly fragmented.
I love when in an interview with Charlie Sheen he is confronted about having been abusive to one of the prostitutes he was sleeping with. He said something like "They don't know me, they're fools. They weren't there, they had no idea what really happened. I feel bad for a person who believes in the media."
This is not only true of people who believe the bad stuff they say about somebody via fragmented pieces of information, but also true about the great and amazing stuff they say about people. Trust me, I know this one for sure... without you knowing, that "amazing incredible human being" you just read about is an immature, self-centered and narcissistic asshole with no grip on reality. Truth is very scarce not only in the our daily social lives, but even more in the media. Don't believe everything you read - exaggerating, lying and sensationalizing are very easy to do. I know, I've done it many times, as have you, so you know.
The people that make me the most sad are the people who buy their own press. The more I notice the illusions the more turned off I get and the less impressed I am by superficial things and accomplishments. People with the greatest sense of fashion and the greatest sense of creating a perfect illusion are such turn-offs. I guess it's the ultimate booby prize of seeing through all of this stuff and maturing some. I've been a pro at selling myself as well, except it never worked too well because my honesty always blew things for me. I always give away my secrets and always end up confessing my lies. I guess nature just made me that way.
In fact, I want to tell you and encourage you to not believe any of the stuff you see on my Facebook. I may have meant something in the moment I wrote it, but once a few minutes have passed I might have changed my mind. Don't believe the story my pictures tell you, because for the most part they say very little about me. Don't buy this article, because I will probably have forgotten that I even wrote it by the time you ask me about it... it happens to me all the time.
Life is too big to cram it into Facebook... so is a personality, a relationship, a family, a soul, a body, a mind. The amount of truth to be found in Facebook is very close to zero. And the same is true for show business. I learned the hard way... and it hurt a lot. Consider yourself warned... life is not what you think it is... it's way more.
PS - By the way... In reality I have less than 10 friends, I have hiked very little, I don't party much at all, the food I eat is usually good, but I usually have to cook it myself. My vacations are not always amazing, I don't really have all that many amazing times, my life is plain, my relationship with my boyfriend has highs and lows, I am far from being a wise guru, I am definitely not perfectly mature (haha), I like to pretend like I'm angry to be cool, but I'm not really that angry, I'm a sensitive cry-baby, people don't always show their love in a nice way to me that much, in fact... that's not even close to true, and I'm just living an ordinary, simple life. Like you are - no matter how much you try to cover it up.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Thursday, September 22, 2011
The Fear of Intimacy
It is hard to be intimate without having to feel our emotions. Intimacy implies closeness and vulnerability. Sadly most of us are unable to have intimacy without sex. This is where most of our sexual issues come from. Intimacy without sex is lame for us. What's the point of being close, being affectionate toward one another if it's not for sex?
Sadly, we deny ourselves the fullness of multidimensional affection and it becomes impossible for us to share intimacy without getting it mixed up with sex. This, to me, is the crux of sexual issues. We have associated affection with sex. This is why many of us assume that if there is any kind of intimacy between any two human beings, that must mean they are fucking each other.
It's funny, I've had people tell me that they know I have sex with my brother! All because we share a level of intimacy that most would envy. Of course I don't have sex with my brother! Of course I don't have sex with all the people that I am affectionate and intimate with! I just don't fear intimacy or affection and I don't have them mixed up with sex!
Don't you ever long to just cuddle? Or have your hair played with? Or be hugged or kissed? Or to sleep in the same bed as someone else? All independent from sex? Of course you do! It's human nature! We love intimacy and closeness. We love close friendships and close relationships. We love affection, intimacy and love. The thing is that since we have most of all of it linked up with sex and since sex is such a bad and evil dirty thing... then yuck!
The other thing is that intimacy is associated with vulnerability and being a loser. Tears of joy or tears of sorrow are such a close and intimate thing... and this too we fear. I am not suggesting we open up to the whole planet and let our closest and deepest emotions flower in the midst of any situation. I am merely suggesting, that perhaps there are times and moments when it is okay to allow ourselves to be intimate with one another.
Why do you think women love gay men so much? In many cases, it has to do with the ability of being intimate without the lust or sex factor. Women crave that! That is why they cling so much to their babies... because a baby can provide a level of intimacy and affection completely disconnected from sex.
I think a lot of sexual issues can come from linking innocence, intimacy, affection and closeness with sex all the time. We are in times when if we say somebody is very attractive or has a great body, that automatically must mean we want to fuck them. If we say we have great chemistry with someone that must mean that we want to have sex with them. We are living in times when if our Karate instructor is attractive and comes to physically adjust our body position we feel uncomfortable because we cannot disconnect intimacy from sex. This is a pathology and I know it all too well because I was a sex addict back in the college days.
I was longing for intimacy, affection, connection, acceptance and love - and the only way to experience a little bit of it was through feeling like I was being tended by someone outside of me that was into me. I had no separation and no ability to unlink intimacy from sex. There was a point in my life where I looked at my phone directory and I had had sexual contact with every single person on the list. I could not have a friendship or a relationship with any level of intimacy that did not lead to sex. In a way it was pure HELL. I was skipping over what I truly wanted - connection, relationship, bonding and sanity. Sadly it became a downward spiral of lack of self-worth, lack of integrity, lack of dignity, lack of honesty and lack of life. Lust became my master and it was the only thing that could make me feel alive. My life became superficial, empty and depressed. I had no idea that what was happening was that I was TERRIFIED OF INTIMACY BECAUSE I WAS TERRIFIED OF FACING MY EMOTIONS.
I am sure the same was true for pretty much every single person I used to hook up with. And that is why I am posting this, because I am sure I am not the only one who was unconsciously going through all of this. Everything was so confusing and unclear. Sex has become so perverted along with our minds and our emotions. Cravings, impulses and fear are the main dictators of our behaviors. It's like we don't own ourselves anymore - mostly because we live in an innocently ignorant confusion that we can't overcome.
May this writing shed some light on why we have behaved and behave the way we do as a human race. Don't buy the stories that sex and intimacy have to go together... I can tell you for sure that that is absolutely not true. I have found a level of inner clarity and peace and have discovered what it is like to have one's will free, instead of controlled by unconscious drivers - maturity is the hope and the heaven we are all longing for, because when one is being driven by our unconscious material... hell is the only product and we look back and wonder what the heck that whole nightmare was all about. This is why when time goes on and one notices the things that fall away by grace one says that one has awoken to the truth. One feels in touch with reality and control over our emotions and impulses is finally available to us. We are no longer victims of the shit we do that we don't want to do or the shit we say that we don't want to say... not that we become perfect, but we learn how to say I'M SORRY.
What could be more intimate and devoid of sex than that?
Sadly, we deny ourselves the fullness of multidimensional affection and it becomes impossible for us to share intimacy without getting it mixed up with sex. This, to me, is the crux of sexual issues. We have associated affection with sex. This is why many of us assume that if there is any kind of intimacy between any two human beings, that must mean they are fucking each other.
It's funny, I've had people tell me that they know I have sex with my brother! All because we share a level of intimacy that most would envy. Of course I don't have sex with my brother! Of course I don't have sex with all the people that I am affectionate and intimate with! I just don't fear intimacy or affection and I don't have them mixed up with sex!
Don't you ever long to just cuddle? Or have your hair played with? Or be hugged or kissed? Or to sleep in the same bed as someone else? All independent from sex? Of course you do! It's human nature! We love intimacy and closeness. We love close friendships and close relationships. We love affection, intimacy and love. The thing is that since we have most of all of it linked up with sex and since sex is such a bad and evil dirty thing... then yuck!
The other thing is that intimacy is associated with vulnerability and being a loser. Tears of joy or tears of sorrow are such a close and intimate thing... and this too we fear. I am not suggesting we open up to the whole planet and let our closest and deepest emotions flower in the midst of any situation. I am merely suggesting, that perhaps there are times and moments when it is okay to allow ourselves to be intimate with one another.
Why do you think women love gay men so much? In many cases, it has to do with the ability of being intimate without the lust or sex factor. Women crave that! That is why they cling so much to their babies... because a baby can provide a level of intimacy and affection completely disconnected from sex.
I think a lot of sexual issues can come from linking innocence, intimacy, affection and closeness with sex all the time. We are in times when if we say somebody is very attractive or has a great body, that automatically must mean we want to fuck them. If we say we have great chemistry with someone that must mean that we want to have sex with them. We are living in times when if our Karate instructor is attractive and comes to physically adjust our body position we feel uncomfortable because we cannot disconnect intimacy from sex. This is a pathology and I know it all too well because I was a sex addict back in the college days.
I was longing for intimacy, affection, connection, acceptance and love - and the only way to experience a little bit of it was through feeling like I was being tended by someone outside of me that was into me. I had no separation and no ability to unlink intimacy from sex. There was a point in my life where I looked at my phone directory and I had had sexual contact with every single person on the list. I could not have a friendship or a relationship with any level of intimacy that did not lead to sex. In a way it was pure HELL. I was skipping over what I truly wanted - connection, relationship, bonding and sanity. Sadly it became a downward spiral of lack of self-worth, lack of integrity, lack of dignity, lack of honesty and lack of life. Lust became my master and it was the only thing that could make me feel alive. My life became superficial, empty and depressed. I had no idea that what was happening was that I was TERRIFIED OF INTIMACY BECAUSE I WAS TERRIFIED OF FACING MY EMOTIONS.
I am sure the same was true for pretty much every single person I used to hook up with. And that is why I am posting this, because I am sure I am not the only one who was unconsciously going through all of this. Everything was so confusing and unclear. Sex has become so perverted along with our minds and our emotions. Cravings, impulses and fear are the main dictators of our behaviors. It's like we don't own ourselves anymore - mostly because we live in an innocently ignorant confusion that we can't overcome.
May this writing shed some light on why we have behaved and behave the way we do as a human race. Don't buy the stories that sex and intimacy have to go together... I can tell you for sure that that is absolutely not true. I have found a level of inner clarity and peace and have discovered what it is like to have one's will free, instead of controlled by unconscious drivers - maturity is the hope and the heaven we are all longing for, because when one is being driven by our unconscious material... hell is the only product and we look back and wonder what the heck that whole nightmare was all about. This is why when time goes on and one notices the things that fall away by grace one says that one has awoken to the truth. One feels in touch with reality and control over our emotions and impulses is finally available to us. We are no longer victims of the shit we do that we don't want to do or the shit we say that we don't want to say... not that we become perfect, but we learn how to say I'M SORRY.
What could be more intimate and devoid of sex than that?
Friday, August 19, 2011
The Embrace Of My Fortune
It is hard to accept oneself in a world that can be so reluctant to allowing nature to be what it is. I hereby embrace the fact that I was blessed with beauty - a beautiful face, beautiful hair, beautiful eyes, a beautiful nose, beautiful ears, beautiful lips, beautiful hands, beautiful arms, beautiful legs and a beautiful body in general. I am very blessed to have been born with a beauty that can easily be globally appreciated. I am grateful for being tall, handsome and healthy.
I hereby embrace, thank and accept my fortune of having a beautiful voice, a beautiful mind and a beautiful soul. I embrace my beautiful emotional body and I feel grateful for having a wonderful psychological structure and personality that allows me to embrace myself in every direction.
I embrace that I have a beautiful family, with a beautiful Dad and Mom and beautiful siblings. I have a beautiful set of people I know and am close with. I am grateful and acknowledge and embrace my friends.
I seriously feel like I got it all. I have a beautiful education and a beautiful mindset. I am healthy, realistic, mature and sincere. I appreciate and embrace and accept that I am honest and loving. I am beautifully caring and accepting.
On the material level I appreciate, recognize, accept and embrace that I live in a beautiful neighborhood, that I have a beautiful car.
I embrace, accept and feel proud of my career as a guide and teacher. I love my website and my videos and my writings and my expressions. I feel proud of who I am as a human and enjoy exploring my journey. I've had a beautiful journey and I accept myself on every level.
I recognize that I am an emotionally, financially and spiritually responsible being who is a gem and jewel in this world. I embrace my physical, mental, emotional and spiritual beauty completely and feel no shame or apology for it. I am blessed beyond belief.
I am proud of my hard work and am excited to enjoy the benefits of humility, compassion and true love. I embrace, accept and enjoy myself on every aspect and guilt, shame, pride and doubt are no longer part of my values. I value self-love and self-love only and I extend that outwards to those who can receive it.
I am in love.
I hereby embrace, thank and accept my fortune of having a beautiful voice, a beautiful mind and a beautiful soul. I embrace my beautiful emotional body and I feel grateful for having a wonderful psychological structure and personality that allows me to embrace myself in every direction.
I embrace that I have a beautiful family, with a beautiful Dad and Mom and beautiful siblings. I have a beautiful set of people I know and am close with. I am grateful and acknowledge and embrace my friends.
I seriously feel like I got it all. I have a beautiful education and a beautiful mindset. I am healthy, realistic, mature and sincere. I appreciate and embrace and accept that I am honest and loving. I am beautifully caring and accepting.
On the material level I appreciate, recognize, accept and embrace that I live in a beautiful neighborhood, that I have a beautiful car.
I embrace, accept and feel proud of my career as a guide and teacher. I love my website and my videos and my writings and my expressions. I feel proud of who I am as a human and enjoy exploring my journey. I've had a beautiful journey and I accept myself on every level.
I recognize that I am an emotionally, financially and spiritually responsible being who is a gem and jewel in this world. I embrace my physical, mental, emotional and spiritual beauty completely and feel no shame or apology for it. I am blessed beyond belief.
I am proud of my hard work and am excited to enjoy the benefits of humility, compassion and true love. I embrace, accept and enjoy myself on every aspect and guilt, shame, pride and doubt are no longer part of my values. I value self-love and self-love only and I extend that outwards to those who can receive it.
I am in love.
Sunday, July 10, 2011
Despertando Del Sueño De La Famosa "Culpa"
Típicamente decido el idioma en el cual voy a escribir basado en la audiencia. En el famoso caso de la "culpa," quiero escribir en español porque siento que lamentablemente las culturas latinas estamos en niveles de consciencia un poco menos elevados que los países Anglosajones, que a mi entender tienen mayor acceso a enseñanzas de esta naturaleza. Lo digo por mi, que he sido fiel estudiante de las enseñanzas que conduncen a la liberación emocional las cuales casi todas han sido escritas en inglés.
Lo que quiero escribir concierne el sentido de culpabilidad que casi todo ser humano, ya sea consciente o inconscientemente carga dentro de si mismo. Este sentido de culpa, en gran parte, es lo que define al ser humano en sí. En mi caso he vivido sientiéndome culpable por no poder complacer a todo el mundo, algo que creo que es universal en estos tiempos. La moda nueva (o ya viejísima) habla del "egoísmo" y lo malo que es. Vivimos tratando de no ser "egoístas" porque eso es malo.
Lo que quiero decir de la culpabilidad es mucho, pero no sé lo que me vaya a salir. Tiendo a escribir espontáneamente lo que me sale de la mente y el corazón y nunca sé realmente lo que voy a decir. Claro, tengo ideas, pero nunca sé exactamente lo que me va a salir.
Número uno, la culpabilidad de una persona es una ilusión que no puede ser verdad nunca. Nadie es tan poderoso como para afectar la historia por si solo. En la vida hay un sinnúmero de causas y efectos que nunca pueden ser reducidos a un individuo. Podrá parecer que la razón por la cual otra persona está triste es por algo que uno le dijo, pero eso es sólo un factor de una cantidad infinita de factores que contribuyeron a la tristeza de esta persona. No existe tal caso como que hay un individuo singular que cause la tristeza de nadie. ¿Por qué? Porque el mundo es enorme y la vida y las emociones de un ser humano son demasiado complejas para ser responsabilidad de un solo factor. Hay cosas como la dieta, la historia, la salud mental, el nivel de entendimiento, el nivel de educación, hormonas, situaciones, condicionamientos psicológicos, sociales, culturales, emocionales y espirituales, etc.
Lo que causa un incidente siempre es mucho más que un individuo, claro existe la ILUSIÓN o la APARIENCIA de que todo fue causado por una persona en específico, pero esto nunca puede ser cierto. Una persona no es tan poderosa como para ser el ÚNICO factor que determina lo que sucede en la vida. Nada es "culpa" de ningún individuo en específico. Esto es una visión primitiva e ignorante, porque el universo está compuesto por una infinidad de factores interconectados que tienen impactos laterales.
El aislar la supuesta "causa" singular de un efecto podrá tener un uso práctico, pero SIEMPRE hay más de una causa para cualquier efecto. La vida no es tan simple como podemos creer que es. Es una trampa y un estado de arrogancia sutil extremo el pensar que uno es responsable por lo que está pasando en el mundo o lo que le está pasando a otro u a otros. Sólo somos una pieza, más que significante, insignificante en cualquier caso. No somos tan poderosos y grandes como para singularmente afectar el curso de la historia por nuestra propia cuenta. Sea la historia de un individuo o sea la historia de algo de mayor magnitud.
Ningún "héroe" o "villano" funcionó por si solo. Esto es una ilusión superficial. Cualquier figura histórica que tuvo un impacto positivo o negativo, no actuó por si solo... siempre hubo un sinnúmero de factores, incluyendo una gran cantidad de otras personas que contribuyeron a cualquier cambio. NO SOMOS TAN INFLUYENTES, SOMOS UNA SEMILLA DE MOSTAZA.
Jesús sigue siendo uno de mi genios, héroes y figuras históricas favoritas por su tono espiritual y místico. Éste genio mismo dijo "Yo no puedo hacer nada por iniciativa Mía; como oigo, juzgo, y Mi juicio es justo porque no busco Mi voluntad, sino la voluntad del que Me envió." (Juan 5:30)
Esto es obviamente un ser que ha llegado a una profundidad tan esencial que ya sabe que el no puede ser el autor de sus propias obras, porque lo que le da vida y voluntad es algo mucho más grande que su ilusión de sí mismo! En nuestros casos menos profundos, tampoco somos los autores singulares de nuestras obras! Hablamos el idioma que nos enseñan y vivimos la vida de la mejor manera que hemos aprendido. NO SOMOS RESPONSABLES POR LA VIDA DE NADIE QUE NO SEA LA DE NOSOTROS MISMOS! Y HASTA EN NUESTRAS PROPIAS VIDAS TENEMOS INOCENCIA. NADA ES NUESTRA "CULPA."
Lo que quiero escribir concierne el sentido de culpabilidad que casi todo ser humano, ya sea consciente o inconscientemente carga dentro de si mismo. Este sentido de culpa, en gran parte, es lo que define al ser humano en sí. En mi caso he vivido sientiéndome culpable por no poder complacer a todo el mundo, algo que creo que es universal en estos tiempos. La moda nueva (o ya viejísima) habla del "egoísmo" y lo malo que es. Vivimos tratando de no ser "egoístas" porque eso es malo.
Lo que quiero decir de la culpabilidad es mucho, pero no sé lo que me vaya a salir. Tiendo a escribir espontáneamente lo que me sale de la mente y el corazón y nunca sé realmente lo que voy a decir. Claro, tengo ideas, pero nunca sé exactamente lo que me va a salir.
Número uno, la culpabilidad de una persona es una ilusión que no puede ser verdad nunca. Nadie es tan poderoso como para afectar la historia por si solo. En la vida hay un sinnúmero de causas y efectos que nunca pueden ser reducidos a un individuo. Podrá parecer que la razón por la cual otra persona está triste es por algo que uno le dijo, pero eso es sólo un factor de una cantidad infinita de factores que contribuyeron a la tristeza de esta persona. No existe tal caso como que hay un individuo singular que cause la tristeza de nadie. ¿Por qué? Porque el mundo es enorme y la vida y las emociones de un ser humano son demasiado complejas para ser responsabilidad de un solo factor. Hay cosas como la dieta, la historia, la salud mental, el nivel de entendimiento, el nivel de educación, hormonas, situaciones, condicionamientos psicológicos, sociales, culturales, emocionales y espirituales, etc.
Lo que causa un incidente siempre es mucho más que un individuo, claro existe la ILUSIÓN o la APARIENCIA de que todo fue causado por una persona en específico, pero esto nunca puede ser cierto. Una persona no es tan poderosa como para ser el ÚNICO factor que determina lo que sucede en la vida. Nada es "culpa" de ningún individuo en específico. Esto es una visión primitiva e ignorante, porque el universo está compuesto por una infinidad de factores interconectados que tienen impactos laterales.
El aislar la supuesta "causa" singular de un efecto podrá tener un uso práctico, pero SIEMPRE hay más de una causa para cualquier efecto. La vida no es tan simple como podemos creer que es. Es una trampa y un estado de arrogancia sutil extremo el pensar que uno es responsable por lo que está pasando en el mundo o lo que le está pasando a otro u a otros. Sólo somos una pieza, más que significante, insignificante en cualquier caso. No somos tan poderosos y grandes como para singularmente afectar el curso de la historia por nuestra propia cuenta. Sea la historia de un individuo o sea la historia de algo de mayor magnitud.
Ningún "héroe" o "villano" funcionó por si solo. Esto es una ilusión superficial. Cualquier figura histórica que tuvo un impacto positivo o negativo, no actuó por si solo... siempre hubo un sinnúmero de factores, incluyendo una gran cantidad de otras personas que contribuyeron a cualquier cambio. NO SOMOS TAN INFLUYENTES, SOMOS UNA SEMILLA DE MOSTAZA.
Jesús sigue siendo uno de mi genios, héroes y figuras históricas favoritas por su tono espiritual y místico. Éste genio mismo dijo "Yo no puedo hacer nada por iniciativa Mía; como oigo, juzgo, y Mi juicio es justo porque no busco Mi voluntad, sino la voluntad del que Me envió." (Juan 5:30)
Esto es obviamente un ser que ha llegado a una profundidad tan esencial que ya sabe que el no puede ser el autor de sus propias obras, porque lo que le da vida y voluntad es algo mucho más grande que su ilusión de sí mismo! En nuestros casos menos profundos, tampoco somos los autores singulares de nuestras obras! Hablamos el idioma que nos enseñan y vivimos la vida de la mejor manera que hemos aprendido. NO SOMOS RESPONSABLES POR LA VIDA DE NADIE QUE NO SEA LA DE NOSOTROS MISMOS! Y HASTA EN NUESTRAS PROPIAS VIDAS TENEMOS INOCENCIA. NADA ES NUESTRA "CULPA."
Thursday, June 30, 2011
La Felicidad Está En Mis Manos
No hay mejor descubrimiento que darte cuenta que tienes control de tu estado de ánimo. Tal vez no sea tan fácil como se lee, pero la llave está en tus manos. Cuando estés dentro de una nube de negatividad, puedes cuestionar tus pensamientos... claro, si te interesa llegar a la paz más que nadar en la oscuridad pesada de tus emociones negativas. Tenemos control y eso es indudable. Cada vez que te sientas hundido bajo una tonelada de pensamientos negativos, familiares y pesados utiliza la espada de la razón y la conciencia y alíneate con la realidad.
Lo cierto es que somos muy dichosos de estar vivos y todo lo que tenemos es de sobra. Recuerda que la vida no es para siempre y pudieses nunca haber nacido o haber estado muerto. Cuando vez las cosas desde este ángulo y si te aprendes el truquito de salir de todo tipo de pesimismo y pesadez verás que cada cosa es suspiro en el bizcocho de la vida.
La vida es un regalo, un milagro divino que está lleno de sorpresas y experiencias enriquecedoras y maravillosas. El simple hecho de poder ver, de poder hablar, de poder pensar, de poder caminar, de poder relacionarte, de poder vestir, de poder reir, de poder llorar, de poder sentir, de poder respirar, de poder elegir, de poder vibrar hace que el viaje valga la pena. ¿Por qué no?
Al parecer la mayoría de nosotros entramos en una etapa de addición a la negatividad y a la pesadez porque eso es lo que vemos al nuestro alrededor, y como buenos imitadores que somos vivimos toda una vida en lo mismo de siempre... quejarnos por lo que nos falta. Tenemos un banco de quejas supuestamente legítimas que utilizamos en cada oportunidad que tenemos. Pero también podemos aprender a ser agradecidos y a darnos permiso para brillar.
Piénsalo, eres único o única... nadie es como tú... nadie tiene tu historia. Eres sumamente especial y fantástico o fantástica. El hecho de que hayas venido de donde viniste con los detalles originales que tiene tu historia y con las particularidades de tu mente, tu cuerpo, tu personalidad y tu vida te hace la única persona como tú. Nadie es idéntico o idéntica a ti... eres una ESTRELLA ÚNICA!
No importa quien seas o de donde vengas o como seas, eres sumamente interesante, al menos para mi porque no te conozco a fondo. Eres un astro de luz que nació para irradiar las maravillas que sólo a ti te pertenecen. No escondas tus regalos, no imites a nadie... eres como eres porque así es que tienes que ser. Ejerce tus pasiones y expresa tu corazón y tu verdad... no tienes que caber en una cajita preestablecida por la sociedad. Practica lo que te gusta practicar, cree en lo que te gusta creer, ejerce lo que te gusta ejercer y confía en tu propio corazón que tiene todas las respuestas perfectas para ti.
Mira lo chulo que es dejar que tu autenticidad y singularidad se exprese! O me vas a negar que este escrito no es verídico y chulo? Me sale porque he aprendido a ser yo sin importar las consecuencias y al igual que tú soy un ser magnífico!
Gracias Daddy por pintarme y gracias Mami por darme a luz... al igual que ustedes soy una obra de arte iluminada! Los amo sin condición!
Un beso al mundo! Mucho amor!!!
Lo cierto es que somos muy dichosos de estar vivos y todo lo que tenemos es de sobra. Recuerda que la vida no es para siempre y pudieses nunca haber nacido o haber estado muerto. Cuando vez las cosas desde este ángulo y si te aprendes el truquito de salir de todo tipo de pesimismo y pesadez verás que cada cosa es suspiro en el bizcocho de la vida.
La vida es un regalo, un milagro divino que está lleno de sorpresas y experiencias enriquecedoras y maravillosas. El simple hecho de poder ver, de poder hablar, de poder pensar, de poder caminar, de poder relacionarte, de poder vestir, de poder reir, de poder llorar, de poder sentir, de poder respirar, de poder elegir, de poder vibrar hace que el viaje valga la pena. ¿Por qué no?
Al parecer la mayoría de nosotros entramos en una etapa de addición a la negatividad y a la pesadez porque eso es lo que vemos al nuestro alrededor, y como buenos imitadores que somos vivimos toda una vida en lo mismo de siempre... quejarnos por lo que nos falta. Tenemos un banco de quejas supuestamente legítimas que utilizamos en cada oportunidad que tenemos. Pero también podemos aprender a ser agradecidos y a darnos permiso para brillar.
Piénsalo, eres único o única... nadie es como tú... nadie tiene tu historia. Eres sumamente especial y fantástico o fantástica. El hecho de que hayas venido de donde viniste con los detalles originales que tiene tu historia y con las particularidades de tu mente, tu cuerpo, tu personalidad y tu vida te hace la única persona como tú. Nadie es idéntico o idéntica a ti... eres una ESTRELLA ÚNICA!
No importa quien seas o de donde vengas o como seas, eres sumamente interesante, al menos para mi porque no te conozco a fondo. Eres un astro de luz que nació para irradiar las maravillas que sólo a ti te pertenecen. No escondas tus regalos, no imites a nadie... eres como eres porque así es que tienes que ser. Ejerce tus pasiones y expresa tu corazón y tu verdad... no tienes que caber en una cajita preestablecida por la sociedad. Practica lo que te gusta practicar, cree en lo que te gusta creer, ejerce lo que te gusta ejercer y confía en tu propio corazón que tiene todas las respuestas perfectas para ti.
Mira lo chulo que es dejar que tu autenticidad y singularidad se exprese! O me vas a negar que este escrito no es verídico y chulo? Me sale porque he aprendido a ser yo sin importar las consecuencias y al igual que tú soy un ser magnífico!
Gracias Daddy por pintarme y gracias Mami por darme a luz... al igual que ustedes soy una obra de arte iluminada! Los amo sin condición!
Un beso al mundo! Mucho amor!!!
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
Ways I Take Care Of Myself
Who's the most important person to take care of? Whatever your answer is, you can't argue with the fact that if the caretaker isn't at his or her best, then the care he or she will give won't be the best. If you don't take good care of yourself you can't take good care of others. The healthier and happier you are, the better you will be able to care for yourself and for others.
Imagine yourself sick and in bed, how are you going to take care of anyone? Until you get better you can't. Imagine yourself tired and angry, how are you going to take care of anyone? Imagine yourself fat and depressed, how are you going to take care of anyone? Imagine yourself ignorant and confused, how are you going to take care of anyone? The bottom line is this: the most important person to care for is yourself.
That said, I came up with the idea of writing out ways in which I like to care for myself so that I can take good care of others... here's a list (I'm sure I'll forget stuff)...
- I meditate
- I go out for walks
- I take naps and get comfortable
- I read good books and consume good information
- I sing for fun
- I eat good food
- I take long showers
- I go to the gym
- I go in the sauna and steam room
- I get pedicures
- I call a good friend
- I talk nicely to myself in my head
- I go to the park and enjoy nature
- I brush and floss my teeth daily
- I light natural scented candles
- I caress myself and tell myself nice things
- I keep in touch with supportive, positive and successful people
- I go to therapy and/or therapeutic gatherings
- I take voice lessons
- I write
- I dance
- I practice my social skills with strangers that seem inviting and gentle
- I stay away from negative, sensationalized information
- I stretch
- I establish boundaries in all of my relationships
- I say no and don't feel ashamed of it
- I keep my thoughts balanced, I avoid sensationalizing, exaggerating or dramatizing things
- I practice spiritual rituals and I keep this very private in order to avoid being criticized
- I practice deep breathing
- I listen to healthy, smart and supportive and loving talks
- I relax
- I trust my instincts
- I nurture my passions
- I avoid working too much
- I avoid overeating and oversleeping
- I tell the truth to myself and others
- I trust myself
- I get massages
- I go swimming
- I go to the beach
- I hangout with good friends
- I work to make my relationship healthy and strong
- I encourage myself and empower myself inside
- I take it easy
- I do not place great expectations on myself, and if I catch myself doing it, I stop
- I keep giving myself the love and support that is my birthright
- I go on vacation
- I save money
This is a pretty short list, there are many more practical and concrete things that I do. Mostly, I think what is most important is to seek BALANCE. Setting boundaries is very important, not overdoing anything is a great one for me since I tend to be an overachiever and since I tend to try and overcompensate for everything due to insecurities that are deep within. I know this because I study myself closely and I seek to provide myself with what I need in order to heal and recover myself. I have noticed that most people do not take good care of themselves, including me at times, for example when I smoke cigarettes in an attempt to avoid my emotions. I also tell myself mean things in my head sometimes because that is what I was taught to do. But these things can be kept in check if one has the intention of caring for oneself. I notice that when I care for myself successfully I am more productive, more creative and more at peace. I also notice that I am more efficient and that I can accomplish a lot more with a lot less work.
One important thing is staying out of denial and not making excuses for why one doesn't care for oneself. We have a million reasons to neglect ourselves and treat ourselves like garbage and we can even justify our crappy lifestyles and pretend like they are actually great when they are not. We do this because we fear exposing our truth. Hiding though, is not a healthy way to live and is very destructive and negligent. We have a responsibility to care for ourselves and love ourselves because that is the only way that we are going to accomplish what we were put on earth for. We don't have to love ourselves but this just makes life a lot more unpleasant and is a lot harsher on ourselves and on others. Living to love oneself and others is the best way of self-care... and if you think this is corny or bullshit then that's a perfect indication that you are filled with self-loathing and self-rejection probably because that's a lot of what you got as a child. Call that child and tell him or her that it's time for a new perspective and time for a new attitude. Without self-love there is no fulfillment. Care for yourself and the life that you want will unfold right before your eyes... SLOWLY. That's a huge key, patience. Growth and healing happen SLOWLY. There is no magic solution. Believing in fast progress or in magic is a form of self-abuse, because it is a fantasy that does not exist.
All the best!
Imagine yourself sick and in bed, how are you going to take care of anyone? Until you get better you can't. Imagine yourself tired and angry, how are you going to take care of anyone? Imagine yourself fat and depressed, how are you going to take care of anyone? Imagine yourself ignorant and confused, how are you going to take care of anyone? The bottom line is this: the most important person to care for is yourself.
That said, I came up with the idea of writing out ways in which I like to care for myself so that I can take good care of others... here's a list (I'm sure I'll forget stuff)...
- I meditate
- I go out for walks
- I take naps and get comfortable
- I read good books and consume good information
- I sing for fun
- I eat good food
- I take long showers
- I go to the gym
- I go in the sauna and steam room
- I get pedicures
- I call a good friend
- I talk nicely to myself in my head
- I go to the park and enjoy nature
- I brush and floss my teeth daily
- I light natural scented candles
- I caress myself and tell myself nice things
- I keep in touch with supportive, positive and successful people
- I go to therapy and/or therapeutic gatherings
- I take voice lessons
- I write
- I dance
- I practice my social skills with strangers that seem inviting and gentle
- I stay away from negative, sensationalized information
- I stretch
- I establish boundaries in all of my relationships
- I say no and don't feel ashamed of it
- I keep my thoughts balanced, I avoid sensationalizing, exaggerating or dramatizing things
- I practice spiritual rituals and I keep this very private in order to avoid being criticized
- I practice deep breathing
- I listen to healthy, smart and supportive and loving talks
- I relax
- I trust my instincts
- I nurture my passions
- I avoid working too much
- I avoid overeating and oversleeping
- I tell the truth to myself and others
- I trust myself
- I get massages
- I go swimming
- I go to the beach
- I hangout with good friends
- I work to make my relationship healthy and strong
- I encourage myself and empower myself inside
- I take it easy
- I do not place great expectations on myself, and if I catch myself doing it, I stop
- I keep giving myself the love and support that is my birthright
- I go on vacation
- I save money
This is a pretty short list, there are many more practical and concrete things that I do. Mostly, I think what is most important is to seek BALANCE. Setting boundaries is very important, not overdoing anything is a great one for me since I tend to be an overachiever and since I tend to try and overcompensate for everything due to insecurities that are deep within. I know this because I study myself closely and I seek to provide myself with what I need in order to heal and recover myself. I have noticed that most people do not take good care of themselves, including me at times, for example when I smoke cigarettes in an attempt to avoid my emotions. I also tell myself mean things in my head sometimes because that is what I was taught to do. But these things can be kept in check if one has the intention of caring for oneself. I notice that when I care for myself successfully I am more productive, more creative and more at peace. I also notice that I am more efficient and that I can accomplish a lot more with a lot less work.
One important thing is staying out of denial and not making excuses for why one doesn't care for oneself. We have a million reasons to neglect ourselves and treat ourselves like garbage and we can even justify our crappy lifestyles and pretend like they are actually great when they are not. We do this because we fear exposing our truth. Hiding though, is not a healthy way to live and is very destructive and negligent. We have a responsibility to care for ourselves and love ourselves because that is the only way that we are going to accomplish what we were put on earth for. We don't have to love ourselves but this just makes life a lot more unpleasant and is a lot harsher on ourselves and on others. Living to love oneself and others is the best way of self-care... and if you think this is corny or bullshit then that's a perfect indication that you are filled with self-loathing and self-rejection probably because that's a lot of what you got as a child. Call that child and tell him or her that it's time for a new perspective and time for a new attitude. Without self-love there is no fulfillment. Care for yourself and the life that you want will unfold right before your eyes... SLOWLY. That's a huge key, patience. Growth and healing happen SLOWLY. There is no magic solution. Believing in fast progress or in magic is a form of self-abuse, because it is a fantasy that does not exist.
All the best!
Our Obsession With Power, Fame, Recognition and The Media
I cannot tell you the amount of times I have sang for a person or a group of people whether it's at work, on the street, for a friend or a family member and I've heard the question "Why don't you audition for American Idol?"
I cannot tell you the amount of times I've had people who have read what I've written whether it's an article, a blog entry, a poem, an essay or something else and have heard "Why don't you write a book?" or "Why don't you write for the newspaper?"
I cannot tell you the amount of times I've done an acting skit or something and people tell me "Why don't you move to California and make movies?"
I cannot tell you the amount of times people have seen professional pictures of me and ask me "Why don't you become a model?"
All of these questions are very nice and flattering and I love to hear them because they are indicative that people see something in me that has potential to shine on a large scale. That's very nice and very sweet. What people don't usually know is that I've auditioned for American Idol three times already, I've tried to write many books, I've tried to come up with something to submit to newspapers, I used to dream and years ago made a plan to move to California to make movies and I when I was in the greatest shape of my life I had thought about becoming a model.
No offense to anyone but I had already thought of all those things. None of those thoughts, ideas or questions were or are original.
The truth is that these thoughts, ideas, suggestions, questions and beliefs have been injected into our veins by our culture and the media. Well-spoken people should be on TV, good singers should be famous, good-looking tall men or women should be models, good writers should have books or articles, good actors should make movies and on and on the list goes. Beautiful kids should do commercials, good-looking and talented people should be famous, good dancers should be behind Madonna, people who know three languages should be traveling, people with good taste for clothes should be in the fashion world... well, you get the point. It's so cliché by now that at least for me it verges on nauseating.
These ideas come from so many distorted perceptions we get... it's funny because we have been indoctrinated to associate power, fame and recognition with happiness and success. In fact in our culture, there is no other model for success that does not involve large scale recognition. The manager is successful, the owner is successful, the famous actor is successful, the CEO is successful, the president is successful, the entrepreneur is successful, the host is successful. People like secretaries, clerks, janitors, mail-men, barbers, etc are only successful IF they work for someone highly successful or IF they are making a lot of money.
So there you have it, success = recognition.
The more people that click "Like" on this note on Facebook, the more "successful" I am. Success is a matter of numbers.
Can we wake up from this long induced and deeply embedded dream? Can we release this obsession? Can we see how untrue it is? Can we get past this craving for the spotlight that makes us feel bored and miserable everyday? Can we be our own heroes and our own stars? Can we let go of the fantasy?
I sure as hell have! It's enough. : )
I cannot tell you the amount of times I've had people who have read what I've written whether it's an article, a blog entry, a poem, an essay or something else and have heard "Why don't you write a book?" or "Why don't you write for the newspaper?"
I cannot tell you the amount of times I've done an acting skit or something and people tell me "Why don't you move to California and make movies?"
I cannot tell you the amount of times people have seen professional pictures of me and ask me "Why don't you become a model?"
All of these questions are very nice and flattering and I love to hear them because they are indicative that people see something in me that has potential to shine on a large scale. That's very nice and very sweet. What people don't usually know is that I've auditioned for American Idol three times already, I've tried to write many books, I've tried to come up with something to submit to newspapers, I used to dream and years ago made a plan to move to California to make movies and I when I was in the greatest shape of my life I had thought about becoming a model.
No offense to anyone but I had already thought of all those things. None of those thoughts, ideas or questions were or are original.
The truth is that these thoughts, ideas, suggestions, questions and beliefs have been injected into our veins by our culture and the media. Well-spoken people should be on TV, good singers should be famous, good-looking tall men or women should be models, good writers should have books or articles, good actors should make movies and on and on the list goes. Beautiful kids should do commercials, good-looking and talented people should be famous, good dancers should be behind Madonna, people who know three languages should be traveling, people with good taste for clothes should be in the fashion world... well, you get the point. It's so cliché by now that at least for me it verges on nauseating.
These ideas come from so many distorted perceptions we get... it's funny because we have been indoctrinated to associate power, fame and recognition with happiness and success. In fact in our culture, there is no other model for success that does not involve large scale recognition. The manager is successful, the owner is successful, the famous actor is successful, the CEO is successful, the president is successful, the entrepreneur is successful, the host is successful. People like secretaries, clerks, janitors, mail-men, barbers, etc are only successful IF they work for someone highly successful or IF they are making a lot of money.
So there you have it, success = recognition.
The more people that click "Like" on this note on Facebook, the more "successful" I am. Success is a matter of numbers.
Can we wake up from this long induced and deeply embedded dream? Can we release this obsession? Can we see how untrue it is? Can we get past this craving for the spotlight that makes us feel bored and miserable everyday? Can we be our own heroes and our own stars? Can we let go of the fantasy?
I sure as hell have! It's enough. : )
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