Thursday, May 19, 2011

I Found A Breath of Reality

I remember how lost in wanting to be "amazing" I was. I didn't realize that I was being amazing the whole time! It's sad how we drive ourselves crazy chasing what we already have. "Amazing" was an illusion in my mind that I could see almost anywhere outside of me... well, not anywhere, I was pretty picky! It had to be Ricky Martin, Adam Lambert, Mark Baxter, Adyashanti, Eckhart Tolle, Deepak Chopra, I don't know... all these "amazing" people who did "amazing" things.

I feel so grateful for the men who have inspired me. All they've done is show me who I am and who I have always been! This AMAZING manifestation of the diversity and divinity of life.

With a big head, with the tip of a pinky missing, with a loud voice, with a brassy personality, with a sweet smile, with bushy dark eyebrows, with a little belly that splits in two, with a scar on my stomach, with a funny posture, with a strange view. I'm a freak! And I love it!

Thank you men who unknowingly fooled me into thinking that there was such a thing other than amazing and that that was me and the rest of the world. It all started with my mom and dad, to me they were gods of perfection, then it went to Ricky, then it went to college professors, to Broadway actors and actresses, then it went to Mark, then it went to Adya, then it went to God and now it's back to me.

I am an amazing being of light and nobody can convince me otherwise! I love myself COMPLETELY and I believe in myself one hundred percent! The sky is the limit and self-love is all I got for me... I don't need anyone else to do it for me... and I don't need to pretend like I am less than anybody else anymore!


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