Spiritual Evolution

It is funny how things can often be totally backwards from what we are taught they are. We are taught to believe that progress and virtue are things that we gain and accomplish through effort and accumulation.

This, if you think about it deeply, cannot be true. We are naturally virtuous and successful. The mere fact that we exist is perfect proof of this. The mere fact that we are alive and donned with a body, a mind and a soul are proof that we are already highly accomplished and highly virtuous and graced.

To realize this fully, one has to stop. Stopping in our culture isn't seen as something noble... our culture teaches us to accumulate and to keep the "fight" up.

The confusion and angst that goes through a being that has been stopped simply because he or she is too spiritually mature to keep the false game of pursuing happening can be agonizing. All sorts of symptoms can come out of this... depression, psychotic breaks, panic attacks, anxiety, fear, among many others.

Sadly, since our culture doesn't understand this, these poor souls are often diagnosed, judged and pressured even more. Not only does the pressure come from the outer voices, but also from the most persistent of all, the voice in our own head that came from outer culture itself. These conditioned voices are usually so wrong about everything, that it is really a shame that we ever believed or continue to believe them.

For those of you who know or sense what I am talking about, relax. There is nothing wrong with you, nothing has gone wrong. What is happening is simply that the old mental models that used to function for you (if they ever did) are no longer functioning. Your body is rejecting these inadequate ideals in an attempt to reharmonize with truly connected functioning.

This process is usually anything but pleasurable because there are generations of conditioning living within you that are being cleared out through your system. You have no idea how lucky you are to be experiencing this.

Think of yourself as a chosen one who has been chosen to release all the generations that came before you. In time, with love and patience, you will bring to the world something new and fresh... you won't be a repeat. You will be a new, authentic and connected being. The price to pay for this gift isn't low... you will have to put up with a lot. You will be misunderstood, you will be feared, you will be questioned and you will be labeled many negative things. The price will be worth it though because what will be born through you is a lot more precious and valuable than anything that has ever happened before. It will be the new consciousness, it will be unlike anything that has ever or will ever exist.

Don't be afraid, it's a very simple happening. Things will start to fall in place mysteriously and you will start to appreciate yourself again. It really helps to be nice and understanding with yourself and others along the process, of course this will be very difficult because it goes against our generational habits of intolerance and lack of understanding.

A suggestion of mine is to remember that everything happens for a reason, you are the way you are for many reasons and others are the way they are for many reasons... there are usually so many reasons that one can never know the complete answer. Usually we are intolerant of ourselves and others because we haven't been fully in touch with the essence of our beings. That is okay though; there is no judgment or blame in that. The toughest thing to do is to ease up on oneself and others... but even though this can be very, very tough... it must be done, otherwise you'll just suffer.

Understanding is a vital key to allowing the birthing of your new self to unfold. It is not easy, but it is possible. Get enlightened.

The Change of Season

We mortals are part of all that's transient
All form moves to the beat of the same drum
There isn't a single manifestation that isn't affected by the swings of totality
There is no such thing as structural stability

A flower withers when the season doesn't favor it
A dog sheds its coat when it becomes obsolete
The wardrobe suffers changes
And hibernation and migration take place

It's wonderful to be conscious
And see the cosmic shifts
Experience all the cycles
And see the falling leaves

Transformation isn't always pleasant
Neither is life
But a being that's in alignment
Can experience depth and truth

As the shells start to collapse
In response to a season's change
Reality starts to break in
And triumph once again

The fearlessness of falling
Starts to dawn within the brave
As those who are frightened harden
And hold on to their shell

My shell is way too broken
My heart is way too open
My trust is too enormous
I see the light again

Slice me
Dice me
Cut through me
For I am fearless and transparent

Giving Life To Space

It is so beautiful to take a square of a blank note and decorate it with a living creation. Before there was any text in this white box there was simply a beautiful white nothing. The reason for creation is pure celebration and joy. This is why God created the Universe. Sitting there for a trillion years staring at the pure potential of emptiness, there had to come a day where the creative capabilities had to be expressed. Had God never said "Let there be light" there wouldn't have been extended opportunities for little mortals like myself to take a blank page or a silent voice and turn it into a song that could be recorded onto a medium.

Now that the silent potential has taken on the form of a sad song, the creative gift can be shared with those who have an empty slot waiting to be filled.

The polishing of one's creative abilities gives rise to a confidence beyond what one imagined possible. The whole world is left behind and one discovers one's innate power and passion. When we connect with what we truly desire and see through all the conflicts that stand in the way of passionate creation, we slowly start to sense an immense power that pulls us towards our calling. At this point all sorts of fears get triggered: "Am I ready?" and a bunch of "What ifs?" stand in the way.

Others on their way look at you and have no clue of what you are going through, usually you are coming out of a desert that nobody will allow themselves to experience... but there comes a point where others disappear and you stand in your great aloneness. You are faced with making the decision to shed your caterpillar suit and blossom into the beautiful butterfly that you were always destined to become. The terror and panic triggered by the death of the body that has been so familiar starts to become sparkling excitement.

You become more and more maturely excited about your opportunity to give life to space. You will now take potential and shape it in the form of your deepest intentions. You will become a co-creator with God and will you discover what true life enjoyment is all about.

Sense the light and joy and give life to space, creation is what life is all about. Shine your light -- it is your destiny!

The Fear of Life

Mike has been through quite a trip... as a kid, he was quite shy but very smart and was one of three siblings. In school, he would get picked on and teased every now and then and he would enjoy riding his bike when he was at home. His childhood was relatively normal, nothing too dramatic happened. When he was in high school he started feeling insecure about his looks, he had a mild case of acne, which to him was severe. Others would notice his self-consciousness about his skin and would often stare at his pimples in response to the unconsciously drawn attention.

When Mike turned 19 he went to college, he picked a major he wasn't too passionate about but was told there would be good money in a career in computer programming. Mike knew little about computers but toughed it out. All through college Mike felt mostly self-conscious and quite insecure. He felt inferior and would always try to please his friends and summon up all he had to give and manufacture smiles and high energy on command. It was an interesting case, a dulled out soul with a bubbly exterior.

One day, a friend of Mike's gave him a spiritual book that talked about the possibility of becoming spiritually enlightened... Mike loved the idea since he had been looking for a way out of his dull inner life. Sure, he had friends, clothes, a job, parties to attend and plenty of company... but Mike felt dull and empty inside, he secretly felt like a phony that was running out of juice to project a happy exterior.

The book sucked Mike in, he became obsessed with spirituality. Shortly after graduation, Mike moved in with his girlfriend Laura in a cozy apartment in the suburbs, he got a job doing computer work and kept on with his spiritual seeking. Everything was relatively well, although the empty, dull, phony feeling kept on going. Mike's false exterior was really starting to get to him. Suddenly, Mike started snapping out and being rude to his girlfriend Laura, he was tired of faking those smiles and positive moods. Then his inability to uphold the phony persona started to collapse at work, and finally, it broke loose with his friends too. The ones who took most of the blow of the upwelling suppressed emotions within Mike where his Mom, Dad and brothers... they really had a piece of him... they really got to hear all his suppressed feelings about them.

Slowly Mike started becoming a wreck, he pushed most of his friends away, he lost his job and rejected his family. Laura had to pay for the rent now as Mike devoured countless spiritual books and attended dozens of spiritual seminars and consulted his spiritual guide. Mike became mostly a recluse. He didn't do much more than read books, listen to tapes and consult his teacher. It was a radical transformation and not for the better. Nobody understood, Mike was seen as sad case, a nutty wreck.

Inside of Mike's head were a bunch of spiritual ideas and thoughts about how the world should be, how people should live their lives and what people should do with their time. He believed that there was something severely wrong with the way life has gone and he was certain that there was such a thing as becoming spiritually enlightened and living in a state of bliss and passion. He continued reading books, attending speeches and talking with his master. Mike was completely unrecognizable to all who knew him, now he had switched his snappy, angry way of relating for a new spiritual persona where he was projecting love, kindness and compassion. Mike knew he was full of shit, but he kept on faking it anyway, he thought it would somehow lead him to his goal.

Crash! It wasn't too long before he couldn't uphold this really difficult show to perform continually, Mike became an even greater jerk again. Laura couldn't take Mike anymore and she divorced him. Mike ended up living with his parents again. Yikes, what a blow to Mike's spiritual ego.

One day, Mike's Dad, who in Mike's eyes was a very unenlightened, uncreative and unfulfilled fool, asked Mike a simple question: "My son, why are you so afraid of life?" Something happened inside of Mike's brain, this question put things in a way that Mike had never thought of before, it made Mike see the truth that he had always refused to see, he was terrified of life and the world. Most of what he always did was simply an avoidance of life, an avoidance of the world, an avoidance of living.

This question triggered Mike's greatest realization, what he called his greatest enlightenment: "Life is for the living"

From then on, ordinary Mike made a vow to live his life simply. He became the CEO of a computer programming firm and remarried; he had two beautiful children and lived happily ever after.

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I wrote this story to reflect a common tendency in people who have a "spiritual personality." I happen to be one of these and I happened to experience this fear of life way more deeply and profoundly than I have ever experienced the fear of death. Some people fear living more than they fear dying, and if this is the case for you, I hope this story inspires you to go out there and LIVE THE LIFE THAT YOU WERE GIVEN!

What A Mature Person Knows

A mature man or woman knows that we are all unique individuals with different personalities, conditioning, inclinations and preferences. A mature person knows that we all come from the same source but acquire different traits along the way. A mature person remembers that we are all made of flesh and bone and that we are basically all the same while at the same time recognizing that we are all completely different and unique.

A mature person is never trying to convince or impose his or her views onto anyone else because there is no need for it. A mature person is non-judgmental and is never violent.

A mature person understands that violence can be as simple as disrespecting or ridiculing and/or mocking someone else.

A mature person isn't looking to be agreed with or understood on any level, because a mature person understands him or herself -- therefore he or she has no need to seek understanding or agreement.

A mature person knows that he or she is not perfect nor needs to be, for perfection is an illusion that can be defined in many incorrect ways. A mature person knows that there is perfection in imperfection and a mature person forgives imperfection because one of the biggest traits of a mature person is that he or she has completely stopped expecting such a thing.

A mature person doesn't believe in images or in idols or ideals. A mature person doesn't believe anything because a mature person knows that it is not necessary to believe in something for that something to be true.

There is no need to believe that you have fingers to KNOW that you have fingers. A mature person never settles for a belief and always strives for KNOWING.

In the end, a mature person realizes and becomes extremely satisfied and comfortable with the fact that it is impossible to know anything because the essence of truth is unknown and mysterious.

A mature person doesn't look for anything... a mature person rides the wave. There is no seeking, striving, yearning, searching, longing, pulling, desiring, pushing, rejecting, sucking, running, avoiding, nothing. A mature person is present and lastly a mature person doesn't get upset when he or she doesn't understand or agree with something... a mature person isn't bothered by paradox or "contradictions" -- for a mature person is clear.